Saturday, February 20, 2010

What is the point of curling and other reflections on the Winter Olympics


Despite the fact that I have basically failed at every athletic endeavor I've ever attempted, I love the Olympics. They make me weirdly patriotic and optimistic about world affairs. If we can all get along on the slopes and on the rink, can lasting world peace be far behind?


Some thoughts on this year's Winter Games in Vancouver, in no particular order:

1. Shaun White looks like a less-creepy Carrot Top














2. Male figure skaters can be sexy even when questionably attired. Let's just say that I wouldn't kick any of these guys out of bed:


















Ok, maybe I would kick Johnny Weir out of bed, but I'm not sure I could get him there in the first place. I am, however, fascinated with the euphemizing of his gayness that plagued commentators during the men's competition.



3. Curling looks neither fun nor athletic. Was it invented by hockey-loving janitors?


4. Now that has someone died, it's pretty tasteless to make luge jokes. Tasteless, but not impossible.

5. Watching the opening ceremony, I wondered if I had smoked marijuana and then forgotten I had done so. My favorite part was what I termed "Hipster Riverdance." I hope you saw it, because after an exhaustive Google image search, this is the best photo I can find:


I've mostly been watching the Games at bars or friends' apartments, because the picture quality of my T.V. is so terrible. But apparently, I'm getting a new flat screen T.V. from my Dad for my upcoming birthday....here's hoping it arrives before the closing ceremony, which undoubtedly will feature more random and unrecognizable Canadian celebrities!

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